If You Can't Be Nice, Look Nice

So last night, some girls and I discovered a mexican restuarant, within walking distance of my apartment that has $1.50 ritas every saturday night.  Hello Heaven!  And the food is delicious too.  So my girls and I go for dinner and drinks.

by 8pm: We had a creeper thrown out of the restaurant for hitting on us.  He had waved at me when I walked in, and I waved back in that "do I know you?" sort of way.  He came by our table no less than 3 times, and awkwardly stood there for a minute before wandering off.  Well, finally he had the courage to talk to us, which he proceeds to do by asking me twice where I live, twice where I go to school, and twice am I really a lawyer. OMG.  I finally caught the waiter's eye who rescued us and kicked the creeper out.  See, told you, I'm flypaper for freaks.

by 10pm:  So a guy there mentioned that he knew the entire Beyonce Single Ladies dance by heart.  I was like oh man I gotta see this.  So S dared me to get a guy to go request Single Ladies.  So I did.  That's right, I had a straight man go up and request Single Ladies so that another straight man could dance, by himself, in the  lobby of a Mexican restaurant.  It was amazing.

by Midnight : I had met a guy who asked me out.  He wanted to take me to church.  I said I had to go to early service.  So he got up at roughly 7am only to remember that he DD'd and his car was back at the restaurant.  So I told him he was going on the blog.  But I am intrigued and am supposed to go out with him soon, so we'll see how it goes.

In the meantime, here is a guest post from H recapping Summer 2005:


Memorable Quotes from Summer 2005:

So as the summer comes to a close and W heads to law school, we decided it was time to recap this summer's best quotes. Let me warn you that this entry is going to be very long. Here they are, in no particular order of course, for your reading enjoyment.

1) "Not shit."
I was on a date with the pervert from Duke (SBA) & he mentions that his birthday is coming up. I ask when and he tells me. Then he asks what I am getting him. Sorry bitch, I don't know you. This is our second date. I'm not buying you a damn present. And I sure as hell hope you don't intend me to offer you sexual favors as a gift because you saw how that went later in the night when you tried to have sex with me, remember? My response to his question was "not shit" and he laughed like I was kidding or something. Idiot.


2) "I do what I want."
W was talking to a guy she likes (I know, shocker. A guy W isn't trying to get rid of) and he asks her if she thought she'd be able to settle down one day with going to law school and being a big time kick ass lawyer and everything. Her response was, "I do what I want." Gotta love it people, gotta love it. This statement was so profound that W & I have incorporated it into our daily vocabulary. It's the best response in the world because it's not REALLY a response. And guess what, we DO do what we want!

3) "Nope. Mudcat."
W was text messaging back & forth with Sun (see her gooo fish entry to find out who that is) & she asked  him when he grew a mustache. He asked how she knew he had it because he knew she wasn't at the game. He asked if one of her friends saw him out but was too cool to say hi & w's response was "nope. mudcat." This is because Mudcat knows about Sun & played against him that night & told W about it later that night when she went to see Mudcat. Talk about a slap in the face for Sun. He should have taken the hint when he found out that he was........ (see next quote)


4) "You're just a stat."
W is hanging out with Sun and some of his teammates in Florida when the topic of summer comes up. Ah yes summer, a time for random (ie: not always sexual) hookups. So Sun asks W how many guys she's hooked up with (see: not sex) this summer. Her response was 10. Then his teammate chimed in and noted that Sun was "just a stat." W agreed and Sun ended up looking like a fool. But he stuck around for more & he still proceeds to call, text, IM W like everyday as if she didn't use him. Get with the program idiot.

5) "Peace."
W & I are designated wingmen for A one night this summer. We thought we were going over to watch and movie and hang out and distract a few guys so A could move in on her guy. Well it turned into an all night drinking fest. The next morning I wake up early so we can get the fuck out of there and before I close the door, I turn to the guy I was assigned (he's still in the bed) and I say "peace." Hahahahahahah how hilarious. We spent the night hooking up (see: NOT sex) and I leave early and all I say is peace. No hanging around, no trying to exchange numbers, nothin. If that's not a gangsta move, I don't know what is people.

6) "Nope. I'm good."
W was getting a ride home from the bar and the DD knowingly passed her apartment about 3-4 times while dropping off other people in the car. W was in the backseat the whole time and when she was finally the last one left in the car, he turns to her and invites her to sit up front, so he could make his move. What's a girl to do? Well if you're W, you buckle your seatbelt, look him in the eye and say "nope. I'm good." while he chauffers her back to her apartment. I mean, when he knowling passes your place 3-4 times then tries to put the moves on you in the car, it's time to go home.

7) "I'm NOT having sex with you."
If you read my entry "don't let the door hit ya where the look lord split ya" then you already know the origin of this quote. I'm just going to paste in a section of that entry... "Furthermore, this guy somehow thinks I am the kind of girl who would sleep with him on a second date. I guess he didn't get the memo. Nor does he pay too much attention to my personality. He ends up looking like an idiot naked as a jay bird while I tell him in true H fashion "We are NOT having sex..." (for those of you who were present, think of the same tone used in "I did NOT bite you!")... Strike two, what the fuck is this guy thinking."

8) "Let's try something new."
I can't reveal the full extent of this quote because it would give away a cardinal girl secret for how to hook up with a guy without acutally hooking up, but he thinks you are. But, I will do what I can to relay the events without revealing too much detail. Here we go: X was drunk & tired and she had a boy over. She wasn't really wanting to hook up that night but he was big time.  X did kind of like this guy but she was too tired to do anything useful for him. So what does she do? She says "let's try something new" and proceeds to do the "pretend hookup," Classic move on X's part. The secret has been passed along to other girls and we've been benefitting ever since.

9) "I'm just not that into you."
I talked about this in a previous entry as well. So here it is "I broke it off with Spelling Bee Champ. I felt kind of bad because when he called me back he sounded really excited to make plans for the weekend. He was also surprised that I didn't want to see him anymore. Oh well, at least now I can stop cringing thinking about the next time we would kiss.... " Bascially what I said was "I'm just not that into you, I was but I'm not anymore." If you need to know why, you can read the previously mentioned entry where I broke down all his strikes.

10) "You were a mistake."
One night W & John Who were hanging out and he was trying to get her to make out again. He was trying to convince her by saying that they already made out so why not again. W looked at this poor soul and said "Yeah, about that, you were a mistake...." Homefry was seriously shocked. I mean, we all have those people we've hooked up with that we regret, right? But how many of us can say that we've looked them straight in the eye and TOLD them they were a mistake to their face? Not many. W can though, and that's because she's gangsta like that.

11) "Drunj in Napa Valley."
While visiting S in San Francisco this summer, he took me to Napa Valley for wine tasting. A few vineyards later and I'm drunk. As you already know, it's not too hard to get me drunk. So there I am, in Napa Valley, drunk, and I decide that it's the perfect time to text W...."drunj in napa valley." W's favorite part about the text message was that I managed to spell DRUNK wrong but somehow got NAPA VALLEY right. What can I say? The j & k are on the same number on the keypad and I made a typo in my wine induced drunkened state.

12) "John who?"
Driving back from Jacksonville, FL W gets a phone call from Turkey/Pool Boy (yes, this AFTER she told him he was a mistake. Do stupid boys ever get it? Apparently not...) So she answers and he says hey W, this is John. She pauses and goes "John who?" Hahaha nice! She doesn't even remember the guy. I mean how could she? There were many boys after him and he wasn't all the memorable to being with. The next day he chased her down while she was walking her dog. This guy is a piece of work huh?

And finally, an honorable mention goes to P....
"You're a good kisser. I bet you give good head."
P was making out with a baseball player (was there ever any doubt?) and he pulls away and looks at her with a straight face and says "you're a good kisser. I bet you give good head." WTF!!! I guess that was him trying to get her to give him head. Well it didn't work. All I have to say is if some fuck tried that line on W or me, he would have been real sorry.... P was nicer about it, even though she didn't take his hint (good girl!)